I’m a former Catholic who converted to Judaism. Your article resonates because I’ve seen immoral behavior in the teachers of both religions. I think the seeming contradiction rests in the humanity of these people. In a perfect world ( which is not this one but hopefully in the world to come) rabbis and priests would be full of only G-D’s goodness. Humans are not capable of such perfection. We are flawed; some with the normal frailties of humans and some who are unable to control behaviors that are truly evil. The latter group are the child molesters, the voyeurs, the wife beaters and con men all while seeming to be in the service of G-D. I’ve come to realize that anyone can pretend holiness or righteousness. It’s the behavior of the individual that tells who they are. We all struggle with living the message of Torah. It’s how we act when no one is looking, when we do the right thing anonymously.
We humans always have a choice: good or bad, moral or immoral, follow Torah or evil impulse.
I understand someone falling prey to their impulses, the strength of which likely seems overpowering- as you say "the child molestors, the voyeurs, the wife beaters and con men all while seeming to be in the service of God." What concerns me is when those individuals then *justify* their behaviors to themselves. If you are choosing to pursue evil, at least own your choices. Know that what you have done is beyond the pale, do your utmost not to do it again, and be aware that you have fallen. To justify your actions is to refuse to accept guilt, or the knowledge that what you have done is very wrong. It's the lack of remorse and regret that really, really gets me.
That lack of remorse is hubris. The capacity to believe that one can do no wrong is a defining characteristic of the sociopath. I doubt that even in the dark of night these people have doubts about the “ permission” they have to behave in any manner they choose. They believe that they are somehow not bound by the laws that restrain ordinary people. Perhaps, for them, the study of Torah is a pure intellectual endeavor without any need to “justify” themselves. So why do these men ( most sociopaths are male) remain in religious life? I think it’s for the power they can wield without consequences.
Once again, beautiful article. I actually tried touching on this point in my last comment on the submissive wife post before it got deleted. Torah is a סם, a potion of life or death, depends on the person learning it. Everything is nuanced and complex and will be understood in context of the person's tendencies unless he is willing to forgo his presumptions and surrender his flawed character to understand the truth. Learning hilchos sukkah actually has a profound effect on a person (see Igeres Hamusar printed in the end of Or Yisrael from R' Y. Salanter). The Midrash (Eicha) says that Hashem declared: "if only they left me but did not leave my torah, because the light that emanates from it will bring them back". The spiritual power of torah is potent but it becomes harder to penetrate a person who is so distant from it. The Ramchal (Derech Hashem 4:2) states that the Torah only has an effect on a person so much as he prepared himself spirituality towards taking it in. However, even still, there will always be a positive effect on one who is seeking the truth. Otherwise it becomes a "sam hamaves"!
I think that in addition to all your important points, we must also stress dealing with spousal (and other) abuse preemptively through education and awareness in the Orthodox community. We need to do more.
This is an exceptionally important and eloquently stated piece, Chana.
Whoa. What courage.
I’m a former Catholic who converted to Judaism. Your article resonates because I’ve seen immoral behavior in the teachers of both religions. I think the seeming contradiction rests in the humanity of these people. In a perfect world ( which is not this one but hopefully in the world to come) rabbis and priests would be full of only G-D’s goodness. Humans are not capable of such perfection. We are flawed; some with the normal frailties of humans and some who are unable to control behaviors that are truly evil. The latter group are the child molesters, the voyeurs, the wife beaters and con men all while seeming to be in the service of G-D. I’ve come to realize that anyone can pretend holiness or righteousness. It’s the behavior of the individual that tells who they are. We all struggle with living the message of Torah. It’s how we act when no one is looking, when we do the right thing anonymously.
We humans always have a choice: good or bad, moral or immoral, follow Torah or evil impulse.
I understand someone falling prey to their impulses, the strength of which likely seems overpowering- as you say "the child molestors, the voyeurs, the wife beaters and con men all while seeming to be in the service of God." What concerns me is when those individuals then *justify* their behaviors to themselves. If you are choosing to pursue evil, at least own your choices. Know that what you have done is beyond the pale, do your utmost not to do it again, and be aware that you have fallen. To justify your actions is to refuse to accept guilt, or the knowledge that what you have done is very wrong. It's the lack of remorse and regret that really, really gets me.
That lack of remorse is hubris. The capacity to believe that one can do no wrong is a defining characteristic of the sociopath. I doubt that even in the dark of night these people have doubts about the “ permission” they have to behave in any manner they choose. They believe that they are somehow not bound by the laws that restrain ordinary people. Perhaps, for them, the study of Torah is a pure intellectual endeavor without any need to “justify” themselves. So why do these men ( most sociopaths are male) remain in religious life? I think it’s for the power they can wield without consequences.
Once again, beautiful article. I actually tried touching on this point in my last comment on the submissive wife post before it got deleted. Torah is a סם, a potion of life or death, depends on the person learning it. Everything is nuanced and complex and will be understood in context of the person's tendencies unless he is willing to forgo his presumptions and surrender his flawed character to understand the truth. Learning hilchos sukkah actually has a profound effect on a person (see Igeres Hamusar printed in the end of Or Yisrael from R' Y. Salanter). The Midrash (Eicha) says that Hashem declared: "if only they left me but did not leave my torah, because the light that emanates from it will bring them back". The spiritual power of torah is potent but it becomes harder to penetrate a person who is so distant from it. The Ramchal (Derech Hashem 4:2) states that the Torah only has an effect on a person so much as he prepared himself spirituality towards taking it in. However, even still, there will always be a positive effect on one who is seeking the truth. Otherwise it becomes a "sam hamaves"!
The poem is powerful and gut wrenching.
I think that in addition to all your important points, we must also stress dealing with spousal (and other) abuse preemptively through education and awareness in the Orthodox community. We need to do more.